Tag: Reuben

Reuben’s Loss

Was it worth it for Reuben? Let’s plunge into the Deeper Waters and find out.

Jacob is about to die and has called in his sons to bless them all. We’re only going to focus on one son and that’s Reuben. Reuben was the firstborn and one would think that he would then be in the place of honor. Generally, he would, but this time, he isn’t. It’s not because Jacob has a revelation that God specifically told him to choose another. Only one reason is given.

He defiled his father’s bed.

Remember back when Reuben slept with Jacob’s concubine? Jacob didn’t do anything then, but he had heard about it. Now is the time. Jacob should be giving Reuben a great blessing and telling him what a success he will be and how he will lead his family.

Reuben has no one to blame but himself.

We live in an odd culture. In our culture, sex is treated like it’s everything. The goal of every romance? Sex. The only purpose of dating and marriage? Sex. We see it on advertising everywhere. What used to be done behind closed doors in movies is now done in the open.

At the same time, out society likes to treat sex in a way like it’s no big deal. Everyone does it. Want to have sex outside of marriage? No biggie. Marriage isn’t that important after all. Want to just live together? Go ahead. Who needs to make a promise.

Yet there is still this problem that we see that so many people when they find out the person they say they love is having sex or interested sexually in someone else and pursuing it, they think there is a betrayal going on. It stings them. We know that there is something different about this activity from all other activities.

It’s weird that the Christian community is said to be prudes in this area, and I won’t deny that many are, but in reality, we are the ones who have the highest view of sexuality. We put it in a marriage covenant because a marriage covenant is the place of a promise. You have promised total loyalty and exclusivity to someone and you are to be with them for life. (We will look at divorce more and more as we go on.)

It’s not because sex is dirty, though that impression has been given before. It’s because it’s something sacred and the more valuable something is, the more you protect it and keep it safe. The sexual revolution really hasn’t done us any favors. We now live in a culture with rampant STDs and broken families.

I sometimes surprise people by saying our culture doesn’t think a lot about sex. It’s entirely true. They do it, dream about it, talk about it, fantasize about it, etc. There’s very little real thinking about it.

Christians should know better. This is nothing to treat casually. This is God’s gift to us and if we misuse it, we will suffer the consequences. Reuben suffered some. We can do the same if we mess up.

In Christ,
Nick Peters
(And I affirm the virgin birth)

The Missing Father

Where was he? Let’s plunge into the Deeper Waters and find out.

Joseph has grown up now and started having dreams. No. I’m not talking about what you get after eating too much pizza at night or about what happens when you are highly ambitious. (Although it certainly looks like Joseph was that.) These are dreams that get the rest of his family, including Jacob, angry. In these dreams, he would see representations of his family bowing down to him.

They weren’t exactly happy to hear all of this. Even Jacob was indignant. Unfortunately, Jacob did show special favor to Joseph though, such as giving him a fancy coat which no one else got. They could have seen it as a way of trying to make the dreams come about to be true.

One day, Jacob sends Joseph to his brothers and after some journeying, he finds where they are. When they see him coming, they decide to kill him, although Reuben does have second thoughts. (Maybe he remembers what he did with his Dad’s concubine and is trying to get in his father’s grace again.)

However, these brothers decide just killing Joseph wouldn’t get them that much. They can get rid of him and still profit some themselves. They just need to sell him into slavery. Fortunately, a caravan is coming through that will purchase him.

Reuben is apparently away while this happens and when he returns, he finds the pit that they had thrown Joseph into is empty and he thinks that the boy has been killed and he tears his clothes. The text doesn’t tell us, but I suspect this still has to do with Reuben’s transgression. Reuben wants to make up somehow for what he did.

However, the brothers still have a problem here. Joseph is gone, but their Dad is going to wonder what happened to him. Somehow, they have a hunch that the message of “We sold him into slavery” isn’t going to go over well. So, they take his special coat and dip it in the blood of an animal and show it to Jacob.

In the book Misreading Scripture with Individualist Eyes, the authors write about this story being told to a Middle Eastern group and when they get to the trouble between the brothers someone asks a question we don’t normally think of. “Where is Jacob?” To be sure, Jacob shows up in the text, but the father is supposed to lead his family and be aware of what’s going on. This father is so unaware of what’s going on that he doesn’t see the jealousy Joseph’s brothers have and don’t realize their desire to see him dead?

Sadly, Jacob’s special care for Joseph has blinded him to the reality of his other sons. You would think Jacob would have learned about the dangers of favoritism after the trouble that he had with Esau, which fortunately did end on a positive note. Unfortunately, he did not, and while God will use this for good, it doesn’t condone that Jacob should have been a more attentive father in the life of his children.

If you’re a father today, don’t make the same mistake. The consequences can be tragic.

In Christ,
Nick Peters
(And I affirm the virgin birth)

Reuben’s Transgression

Why did Reuben do what he did? Let’s plunge into the Deeper Waters and find out.

In Genesis 35, we have the deaths of Rachel and Isaac. Rachel dies giving birth to the second son she bore for Jacob. Isaac dies simply because he’s an old man and it’s his time. During this event, something strange happens also. Just after these deaths, we are told that Reuben, the firstborn son of Jacob, goes in and sleeps with Rachel’s concubine, Bilhah, and Jacob hears about it.

Why?

This is the first time we have a case of the son sleeping with someone that his father has slept with as well recorded in Scripture. The other case that I can think of now is when Absalom pitched a tent on the roof of David’s palace and went in and slept with his father’s concubines. Now it could be that many young men reading might think that Reuben is just wanting to get his game on and have sex and Bilhah is available. Possible, but not really likely.

In both cases, both persons are asserting a show of dominance. When Absalom sleeps with the concubines of David, he is trying to show superiority and having this be done before all of Israel is a very public statement. It’s not about sex per se. It’s about power.

In Jacob’s family, his wife has died and his Dad has died. Could Reuben then be trying to assert control? What if the vacuum keeps going and Jacob himself is removed? Reuben himself wants to be the one to lead the family then.

The text right after this seems to single out Reuben anyway. We are told a list of the descendants of Jacob. Through Leah, we are told that Reuben was born and that Reuben was the firstborn. Then, the other sons are mentioned without comment, as if they were incidental to all of this.

It’s as if the text is saying “Yes. Reuben is born. Remember him? He’s the firstborn. Then there were all these other sons that were born as well.” It’s wanting to stress that this is the position Reuben would naturally have over his family.

And sadly for him, he would have had it. Had things run their course, it could be that Reuben could have naturally been the head of the family, although that is not certain since Jacob did favor Joseph as the firstborn of Rachel, but when Jacob blesses his descendants and tells their future, he says that Reuben will no longer excel.

What is the reason? He went up on his father’s bed and defiled it. This is the only time in the text when Jacob explicitly speaks of this event. Reuben is praised greatly just before that pronouncement as the firstborn of Jacob. He was the first sign of Jacob’s strength and excelling in honor and power, but because he tried to grab it on his own, he will not have it.

Whenever and wherever sex takes place and who it is with, it is always a big deal. Proverbs warns us that adultery arouses a husband’s jealousy and he will not take any bribe when he gets his revenge in. We live in a society that may try to treat sex as if it was just something recreational, but many of us know that this is not so. When we are cheated on, we know immediately that something deeper is happening and as a man who has been divorced facing this reality, it definitely hits home every day.

Sadly, while sex can be a great power for good uniting husband and wife and bringing a new life into the world, used improperly, it can just as much cause devastation. It did for Reuben. It does for many people today.

Treat it carefully.

In Christ,
Nick Peters
(And I affirm the virgin birth)